How far can you afford to bend to preserve your relationship? Most relationships require us to bend to a certain extent, but how much can we bend without a loss of self? How far can you go in giving up yourself to avoid losing your partner? How much of yourself can you afford to sacrifice to avoid losing someone you love?
A truly loving relationship is a relationship where each person accepts and even values the differences between them. If you have to excessively bend your values to preserve the relationship, what are you preserving? You are not preserving a loving relationship since love does not demand that you constantly bend your values. When both partners are open to learning about their differences, those differences become fertile ground for the process of personal and spiritual growth.
Problems occur when one or both partners are not available for exploration and learning. If one partner says, “Just accept me the way I am,” or gets angry or withdrawn when the other partner attempts to discuss the situation... learning is impossible. Then the other partner either has to acquiesce or leave…not a healthy situation. On the emotional AND spiritual level, you can afford to lose your partner but you cannot afford to lose yourself.
But I digress....
